I'm sorry...

Being the selfish bastard that I am, I wrote the post just below this one, just venting my frustration at my perception that part or all of the group is still pissed at me because of the New Year's celebration I missed.
I thought people would react by being a bit annoyed, definitely communicating, but I never thought that I would hurt someone. In this case, I think I have wronged Mathieu, Wendy and Arnaud, because they were pointed out of the group. I love you guys, and although I was extremely clumsy in both the fact that I ranted and the way I worded it, I'm glad that I talked. Arnaud talked to me on MSN, posted a short comment, and made me realize that I was the one who was still thinking about that fateful missed reunion.
My bitterness affected me unconsciously, and any random pun, or slowness in responding, or hesitation, I interpreted as resentment.
Mea Culpa. I'm really sorry. You guys are the best friends a man could have, and I'm sorry that I hurt you. I think part of this is that you guys actually still hang out together every now and then. Unlike the people I did not berate, you stayed in place, and get to see your friends more often, or at least talk together every now and then. I think I was jealous of that, jealous that Mathieu and Arnaud got to spend more time together than me with any of them, jealous that it was easy (in my mind) for you guys to see each other. Even Marcel gets to go home to you guys, while I spend my vacation time in Lebanon every year (nevermind the fact that Marcel's a walking zombie since he spends his life working hard in his lab, and that he's alone in a WASP and racist town/school)

Either way, I've realized the error of my ways, and instead of lashing out, I will reach out more and at least try to post on this place regularly enough that I can tell you guys what's up and read your news.

Love, Karim

Below's a space for a few personal messages:
Mathieu, you're always first in my mind. I'm so glad you graduated, I know no one that deserved to get that diploma. I hope everything will be fine for you in your job search, and that you won't lose faith in yourself. You are (and always have been) more than the sum of your friends, a yin to our yang, truly Bouddha, wise and thoughtfull and patient. Can't wait to see you again.
Wendy, you're the one who made me write again. You always reached to me, even when you were rightfully pissed at me, but thankfully also when you needed help. That's what's special with our group, we will always be there for each other in a time of need, and you're a prime example of that. I was harsh below, but what I really wanted to say is that thanks to you, I feel like I've been able to get something out of the back of my mind in the open and get rid of it.
Arnaud, thanks for taking the time to talk to me, always. This post here is thanks to you talking to me. I feel good about stuff again. Thank you so much.
Marcel, congrats on your teach getting what she wanted, I hope that now you have time for sleep and rest and a social life.
Bourgui, it's great that you have a job finally. I know how much it sucked for you to be sitting, sending resumes and not getting a way to get things working for you. I'm so glad everything is back on track.
Tophe, when you read this, the world will have ended in a nuclear apocalypse. You will then know that I miss you.